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You ever wonder why stuff happens? I started off this year wondering just that. Through a series of experiences I was left wondering - WHY? It's so frustrating trying to figure it out. But sometimes the answer doesn't come right away.
Which leads me to NOW. The my answer came today.
First though, I had to go through being frustrated and unsure of myself. Here's the thing- I heard of a scrapbook online store opening up spots on their DT. I was up for it. After months of not being on a DT I was ready for the challenge again. I had gained back confidence and was ready to try again. (okay, the free scrap stuff was a biggie too :) Anyway, I contacted the owner and sent my portfolio etc. and she contacted me back saying she was interested. COOL, I thought. So she said to get on the forums and try out. Well, she announced the team and I never made it. Simple as that. I was left with a heartbreak since my "art"/scrapping is so personal to me. I was bummed. Really bummed. I didn't understand why others were chosen. Was my style offensive? Too artsy? Not considered scrapbooking? They just said "No".
So I made a point to move on. Only after I decided I was happy with my art. It's me. It's not me trying to be somebody else. It's just ME. I had signed up at SISTV months earlier and thought I was finally ready to upload layouts and share and make friends in the scrap community. They were SO supportive. Man I love them so much. I checked up on them EVERYDAY. I loved it. I loved leaving comments, encouraging my SISters :) I truly felt accepted and that was perfect for me.
Then this fashionista search started and I was like....hmmm...maybe....maybe not. Eh. What the heck. I'll try- I felt that comfortable again and confident that if I didn't make it, I'd STILL be happy. Because I was happy hanging with my SISters.
JJ over at Scrap in style TV announced the 16 new Fashionistas and I"M ONE OF THEM!!!!! It was soooooooo tough! I've never stretched myself so much! I can truly say I gave my all. ME 100%. So JJ gave me a chance. Me along with 15 of my newest friends. I still can't believe it! ME!? I cried like Sandra Bullock in Miss Congeniality :) I fell apart like mush. (Thank you Mr. Handsome for the sweet serenade of las mananitas- that only made me cry harder) Totally excited. I'm ready.
I wouldn't have been able to be a FASHIONISTA if I had gotten accepted for this "other" DT. See? This happened for a good reason. Yeah it hurt at first. But man I LOVE how God works. I LOVE it. I get it now. I am so happy I DIDN"T make the other team. Because THIS sure beats the other one!!!! LOL. And now I know why I got rejected. I'm okay with it. Something better and more fulfilling came along. I'm just thankful I see that. I hope that for the rest of the girls who didn't make it this round do not loose hope in making it the next. Because you never know when your time will come to shine :) So don't stop trying! Keep going, keep creating and ALWAYS keep scrapping for YOU.
Much love and hope
-Debee